12.29.2003
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE CHECK THIS OUT!! IT IS TOOO FUNNY!!
A MUST HAVE FOR ALL HORNY TOADS! THIS WOMEN WILL TEACH YOU THINGS YOU THOUGHT YOU ALREADY KNEW! THERE'S A PLETHORA OF INFORMATION HERE, NEW TOYS, WAYS TO TEACH OLD DOGS OLD TRICKS AND MAKE IT SEEM LIKE IT IS NEW!! FUN STUFF, MANY LAUGHS GOOD TIMES... TALK SEX WITH SUE ON THE OXYGEN CHANNEL ON SUNDAYS AT 11PM EST.
Comments-[ comments.]
FUCK THE RULES! HERE'S MY RULES FOR HEDONISTIC SUCCESS... (and lots of sex)
I am 32 years old... i started having sex when i was 15, so for the majority of my life, i have been sexually active- and i mean REALLY SEXUALLY active! Sex has become somewhat of an obsession with me. I can never learn enough, experiment enough, come enough or have enough of it. I find my little perversities and run with them. I have my own set of rules by which I have comfortably existed without guilt for my general hedonistic behavior.
FUCK THE RULES AND SOCIETY's MORALS AND STANDARDS!
Here are some of MY RULES that have faired well with my hedonistic lifestyle and led me to where I am today- liberated from social standards and satisfied sexually:
RULE #1- NEVER SCREW SOMEONE YOU CARE ABOUT AND NEVER CARE ABOUT THOSE THAT YOU SCREW! Sounds harsh, but you'll save LOTS of time and energy separating the two- atleast for me. When I have sex with someone, IT CHANGES EVERYTHING!! I have lost many friends to what becomes a sexual obsession they develop for me- Men and Women! Unless you are into ill-fated relationships or looking for long-term love, then treat your friends like you would your mother (unless you sleep with your mother, in which case no one's rules would aptly apply.)
RULE #2- SEX FOR REVENGE IS ACCEPTABLE ONLY WHEN YOU KEEP THE VICTORY A SECRET. Knowing that you came and conquered an arch enemy's boyfriend or even an old, jilted lover can be oh-so much sweeter when you can carry the fact around as your own perverted sexual secret. No need to make it obvious, a true sexual diva's aura is founded on mystery and cloaked in ornery smiles- the smiles that say a 1000 words by saying NOTHING at all. KEEP THEM GUESSING!
RULE #3- SEX WITH MARRIED MEN OR WOMEN IS ABSOLUTELY OK IF IT IS JUST ANIMAL-LIKE RAW SEXUAL LUST. NEVER, EVER ALLOW YOURSELF TO THINK OR FEEL ANYTHING MORE THAN THE MOMENT! Don't get caught up in drama, emotions, or ludicrous fantasies about someday. Grab your nut and go! Think of it as a free-be, no pain, no gain just GLORIOUS, UNCOMPLICATED SELF-INDULGING SEX. By all means, keep this a secret! Ruining a marriage is an awful thing! But sleeping with someone's husband is just pure, good times! The naughtiness and danger of the situation makes it soooo much fun. No one's feelings get hurt as long as it really isnt a big deal and you both DIE with that secret. Keep it simple, take if for what its worth and put another notch on the bedpost baby! But BE-HAVE!
RULE #4- NO HEAD GAMES!! THE ONLY GAMES THAT SHOULD BE PLAYED ARE SPIN THE BOTTLE OR STRIP TWISTER! THE ONLY HEAD THAT SHOULD BE...Well you know. Leave the head games at the door, unless of course, it is part of a fantasy-like role play. People don¡¦t born stalkers, they are made by stupid bitches playing head games! Sex shouldn¡¦t be played like a chance card. Unless you have a get-out-of-jail-free card to save your ass.
RULE #5 WATCH OUT FOR BURNING BRIDGES! Nothing is more comfortable than an old pair of shoes or an ex-boyfriend who you always enjoyed sex with but just couldn't live with. (in which case he becomes the latter case in rule #1). No odd moments, no training required, no akward reconciliation attempts- just a body you used to love to love! A little spice to your dish of delicious men!
RULE #6- TRY TO WAIT UNTIL YOUR FRIEND HAS FOUND SOMEONE NEW SHE TALKS ABOUT MORE THAN HER EX THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO TAKE FOR A RIDE ON THE CURISOTY TRAIN! You already know he is a jerk because she told you and he has probably been trying to screw you for a long time anyways. But friends are harder to find than your way friend's ex's pants beside your bed. Curiosity is understandable- after all the long, juicy stores about how great sex was you had to endure listening about when they were going out and happy. Now he has a small penis and was sexually selfish??? Hmmm... I better find that out for myself- just for his sake. In any case, it is best to die keeping this secret too! Women are funny about old honeys. Even though SHE doesn't want fool, she damn sure don't want YOU to have him. (Another freebee)
RULE #7- IT'S GOOD TO KEEP BACK ONE THING YOU WANT TO SAVE FOR THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE SOMEDAY. Men dont like thinking they are playing on chartered territory. They are hunters and adventurers. Not all men deserve to touch your secret no-no place! So pick and choose these things carefully and but by all means- EXPERIEMENT, EXPERIMENT, EXPERIMENT!!! I recently allowed someone in my unexplored backdoor, although I thought I never would like that, I found it oddly sensational. I guess I liked it, I know I liked him ;-)
RULE #8- IN THE EVENT YOU MEET SOMEONE WHO MAKES YOUR TOES CURL, YOUR KNEES WEAK AND YOUR BED ONE HUGE WET SPOT- IF YOU CAN LOOK HIM IN THE EYES WHILE COMING ALL OVER YOURSELF THEN DITCH ALL THE RULES AND MAKE NEW ONES! MEN LIKE THAT ARE FEW AND FAR BETWEEN!! I SHOULD KNOW- I'VE BEEN TESTING DRIVING THEM FOR MORE THAN HALF MY LIFE!
RULE #9- PREMARITAL SEX IS A MUST!! I hear people talk about how you should test drive a car before you buy it, but I say FUCK THAT!! TEST DRIVE THE WHOLE DAMN LOT! Words to live by!!!
Comments-[ comments.]
FUCK THE RULES AND SOCIETY's MORALS AND STANDARDS!
Here are some of MY RULES that have faired well with my hedonistic lifestyle and led me to where I am today- liberated from social standards and satisfied sexually:
RULE #1- NEVER SCREW SOMEONE YOU CARE ABOUT AND NEVER CARE ABOUT THOSE THAT YOU SCREW! Sounds harsh, but you'll save LOTS of time and energy separating the two- atleast for me. When I have sex with someone, IT CHANGES EVERYTHING!! I have lost many friends to what becomes a sexual obsession they develop for me- Men and Women! Unless you are into ill-fated relationships or looking for long-term love, then treat your friends like you would your mother (unless you sleep with your mother, in which case no one's rules would aptly apply.)
RULE #2- SEX FOR REVENGE IS ACCEPTABLE ONLY WHEN YOU KEEP THE VICTORY A SECRET. Knowing that you came and conquered an arch enemy's boyfriend or even an old, jilted lover can be oh-so much sweeter when you can carry the fact around as your own perverted sexual secret. No need to make it obvious, a true sexual diva's aura is founded on mystery and cloaked in ornery smiles- the smiles that say a 1000 words by saying NOTHING at all. KEEP THEM GUESSING!
RULE #3- SEX WITH MARRIED MEN OR WOMEN IS ABSOLUTELY OK IF IT IS JUST ANIMAL-LIKE RAW SEXUAL LUST. NEVER, EVER ALLOW YOURSELF TO THINK OR FEEL ANYTHING MORE THAN THE MOMENT! Don't get caught up in drama, emotions, or ludicrous fantasies about someday. Grab your nut and go! Think of it as a free-be, no pain, no gain just GLORIOUS, UNCOMPLICATED SELF-INDULGING SEX. By all means, keep this a secret! Ruining a marriage is an awful thing! But sleeping with someone's husband is just pure, good times! The naughtiness and danger of the situation makes it soooo much fun. No one's feelings get hurt as long as it really isnt a big deal and you both DIE with that secret. Keep it simple, take if for what its worth and put another notch on the bedpost baby! But BE-HAVE!
RULE #4- NO HEAD GAMES!! THE ONLY GAMES THAT SHOULD BE PLAYED ARE SPIN THE BOTTLE OR STRIP TWISTER! THE ONLY HEAD THAT SHOULD BE...Well you know. Leave the head games at the door, unless of course, it is part of a fantasy-like role play. People don¡¦t born stalkers, they are made by stupid bitches playing head games! Sex shouldn¡¦t be played like a chance card. Unless you have a get-out-of-jail-free card to save your ass.
RULE #5 WATCH OUT FOR BURNING BRIDGES! Nothing is more comfortable than an old pair of shoes or an ex-boyfriend who you always enjoyed sex with but just couldn't live with. (in which case he becomes the latter case in rule #1). No odd moments, no training required, no akward reconciliation attempts- just a body you used to love to love! A little spice to your dish of delicious men!
RULE #6- TRY TO WAIT UNTIL YOUR FRIEND HAS FOUND SOMEONE NEW SHE TALKS ABOUT MORE THAN HER EX THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO TAKE FOR A RIDE ON THE CURISOTY TRAIN! You already know he is a jerk because she told you and he has probably been trying to screw you for a long time anyways. But friends are harder to find than your way friend's ex's pants beside your bed. Curiosity is understandable- after all the long, juicy stores about how great sex was you had to endure listening about when they were going out and happy. Now he has a small penis and was sexually selfish??? Hmmm... I better find that out for myself- just for his sake. In any case, it is best to die keeping this secret too! Women are funny about old honeys. Even though SHE doesn't want fool, she damn sure don't want YOU to have him. (Another freebee)
RULE #7- IT'S GOOD TO KEEP BACK ONE THING YOU WANT TO SAVE FOR THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE SOMEDAY. Men dont like thinking they are playing on chartered territory. They are hunters and adventurers. Not all men deserve to touch your secret no-no place! So pick and choose these things carefully and but by all means- EXPERIEMENT, EXPERIMENT, EXPERIMENT!!! I recently allowed someone in my unexplored backdoor, although I thought I never would like that, I found it oddly sensational. I guess I liked it, I know I liked him ;-)
RULE #8- IN THE EVENT YOU MEET SOMEONE WHO MAKES YOUR TOES CURL, YOUR KNEES WEAK AND YOUR BED ONE HUGE WET SPOT- IF YOU CAN LOOK HIM IN THE EYES WHILE COMING ALL OVER YOURSELF THEN DITCH ALL THE RULES AND MAKE NEW ONES! MEN LIKE THAT ARE FEW AND FAR BETWEEN!! I SHOULD KNOW- I'VE BEEN TESTING DRIVING THEM FOR MORE THAN HALF MY LIFE!
RULE #9- PREMARITAL SEX IS A MUST!! I hear people talk about how you should test drive a car before you buy it, but I say FUCK THAT!! TEST DRIVE THE WHOLE DAMN LOT! Words to live by!!!
think about thinking~ 'cuz thinking is GOOD!
Think About This….
Maybe it’s time that God had a voice,
And He, and not us, would make the choice.
If He could tell the whole world of his will,
Would finally the death and the fighting be still?
Or would he love those much more
Whose rituals are full of guts, blood and gore?
And which of those would he love less
those that by Jesus or Allah have been blessed?
Isn’t it silly to think God would begin
To judge NOT by our actions, but rather our skin,
Or by the hair and eye colors we carry,
Or the number of wives that we marry?
Who should be punished more –
- Muslamic Osama or crack-smoking whore?
And now for the task of which side to deplore:
Killing in the name of a terrorist war
Or in the name of religious score?
Both are against his written word that is sure.
Should he choose instead to grace with hope,
Only the peaceful, mass praying Pope?
A heavenly- afterlife would he deny,
All those who covet and tell little lies?
Cause that would be most
Who eat sliced bread toast.
Can capitalistic hypocrisy be disguised
By giving more and more of your tithes?
And for those who can’t give like in Uzbekistan
Cuz they just barely live by mouth to hand,
Would perhaps living an honest life
And loving thy neighbor possibly suffice?
What a surprise if he choose to forsake
The Ultra-holy religious fakes
Who ignorantly turn up their nose in dismay
If Buddha is to whom you prefer to pray?
Maybe it’s not morally right
To continue to politically fight
with those who don’t pray
And church the same day?
For wouldn’t certainly God equally cry
From all of the senseless numbers who die
From suicide bombers intruding one nation
Who starves another’s children by political sanctions?
But what about those from far distant lands
Void of all libraries and and bible- book stands?
Should African tribes live in fear,
For they have no access to possibly hear
The voice of a Southern Baptist preacher
Or an Orthodox vacation bible school teacher?
Should the disadvantaged - souls be eternally damned
Or given a free ticket to the promise land?
Isn’t the purpose of all religions to care
And treat all mankind equal and fair?
And lend a hand to those who grieve
And pray for sinners, wrong- doers and thieves?
And try to live in a righteous way,
Regardless of your holy day?
And doesn’t all religions stress
The humble and merciful will be blessed?
I don’t believe God is hateful and cruel
Or cares what religion your country is ruled.
Suppose that within his ultimate plans
His purpose is to reach all different humans
And Religions disguised as equal a choice
Regardless of Babylonic language and voice.
For He is still waiting up there far above.
And I think he’d embrace us all with the same love
Whether we attend a church, mosque or Temple
He universally loves us all by example
To be like God is to not discriminate
Those who you love, from those you hate.
This is unbiased love that man cannot do
THAT’S WHY THERE IS ONE GOD
AND BILLIONS OF YOU!
Comments-[ comments.]
Maybe it’s time that God had a voice,
And He, and not us, would make the choice.
If He could tell the whole world of his will,
Would finally the death and the fighting be still?
Or would he love those much more
Whose rituals are full of guts, blood and gore?
And which of those would he love less
those that by Jesus or Allah have been blessed?
Isn’t it silly to think God would begin
To judge NOT by our actions, but rather our skin,
Or by the hair and eye colors we carry,
Or the number of wives that we marry?
Who should be punished more –
- Muslamic Osama or crack-smoking whore?
And now for the task of which side to deplore:
Killing in the name of a terrorist war
Or in the name of religious score?
Both are against his written word that is sure.
Should he choose instead to grace with hope,
Only the peaceful, mass praying Pope?
A heavenly- afterlife would he deny,
All those who covet and tell little lies?
Cause that would be most
Who eat sliced bread toast.
Can capitalistic hypocrisy be disguised
By giving more and more of your tithes?
And for those who can’t give like in Uzbekistan
Cuz they just barely live by mouth to hand,
Would perhaps living an honest life
And loving thy neighbor possibly suffice?
What a surprise if he choose to forsake
The Ultra-holy religious fakes
Who ignorantly turn up their nose in dismay
If Buddha is to whom you prefer to pray?
Maybe it’s not morally right
To continue to politically fight
with those who don’t pray
And church the same day?
For wouldn’t certainly God equally cry
From all of the senseless numbers who die
From suicide bombers intruding one nation
Who starves another’s children by political sanctions?
But what about those from far distant lands
Void of all libraries and and bible- book stands?
Should African tribes live in fear,
For they have no access to possibly hear
The voice of a Southern Baptist preacher
Or an Orthodox vacation bible school teacher?
Should the disadvantaged - souls be eternally damned
Or given a free ticket to the promise land?
Isn’t the purpose of all religions to care
And treat all mankind equal and fair?
And lend a hand to those who grieve
And pray for sinners, wrong- doers and thieves?
And try to live in a righteous way,
Regardless of your holy day?
And doesn’t all religions stress
The humble and merciful will be blessed?
I don’t believe God is hateful and cruel
Or cares what religion your country is ruled.
Suppose that within his ultimate plans
His purpose is to reach all different humans
And Religions disguised as equal a choice
Regardless of Babylonic language and voice.
For He is still waiting up there far above.
And I think he’d embrace us all with the same love
Whether we attend a church, mosque or Temple
He universally loves us all by example
To be like God is to not discriminate
Those who you love, from those you hate.
This is unbiased love that man cannot do
THAT’S WHY THERE IS ONE GOD
AND BILLIONS OF YOU!
12.05.2003
HOW DIANA GOT HER GROOVE BACK
HOW DIANA GOT HER GROOVE BACK
yesterday, i spent quite a bit of time contemplating my aging process and where i still fit in as a woman sexually.
at my age i am too old to still be single, yet too young to acknowledge my age-derived disadvantage and diminshed choices.
not to toot my own horn, but i have always been a woman who got whatever or whoever i wanted.
i would go to a bars and make 5$ bets with my guys friends about who could pick up and screw somebody first.
i had prime pickings for a while, sometimes just to add insult to injury, i would pick up the girl that my guy friend choose.
now, as i age, as i start to realize that my physical body cannot keep up with my sexual and emotional immaturity....
I POUT!! i won't give up, because i am just not good at rejection and i no longer have the body of a teenager.
that's not all...
for the last few weeks, i had to deal with my ex finding "someone else", before I did...
i reacted childishly, but the reality is that i have had some of the best times as a single woman since we broke up.
i dont want him back at all, but i hate the fact he has a "sure thing" fuck and i am still interviewing potential boy toys.
in a moment of weakness, i went to bed sad and feeling like maybe i was "losing my MOJO".....maybe i should "grow up".
As only my luck would have it, I later hear a tenacious banging on my door and my bedroom window at 4am.
not looking or feeling my best, i relunctantly opened the door... what was behind it BLEW MY MIND!!
maybe i have the Mrs. Robinson syndrome, i dont know,
regardless, i find myself incredibly attracted to younger boys.
I opened my door to the most beautiful speciman i ever laid eyes on (i ever laid actually)...
my ex-boyfriend's roommate, standing before me like an obiedent, hornery boy...
i had met him a few times before and each time i found myself fighting my sexual attraction to him,
after all i wasn't proud of it as he was only 24 and my ex's best friend,
but he really did get my juices flowing and my sexual prowler instincts.
MANY times i fantasized about him having his way with me, and suddenly - there he was before me,
He was so sexy and confident, so delicious... i wanted to EAT HIM ALIVE....
The point is, just as i thought i was about to "give in" to my invitable fate of being too old to be sexy (i'm only 31).
Life, god, destiny, temptation -whatever- placed this young man at my door.
for the first time, i was intimidated, reluctant, unsure if i could meet his normal standards (young, hard bodied, perky tits)
but that sweet smelling, perfectly sculpted, 24 year old boy came over to ROCK MY WORLD~
he proudly warned me about his dick and he was right...
tiny waste, broad shoulders, young, dark hair, melted chocolate brown eyes~~ I had no choice,
i had to own that, if only for a night...
he kept telling me how sexy he'd always thought i was,
while he delivered me a joy i had long been deprived of...
hours of unadultered pleasure~ I knew then, i still had it.
my mojo is still in tact, and this had to be a sign from the Sex Gods-a sign of encouragement.
as i lay in bed, i am going crazy as i can still smell him on my pillow.
a combination of raw sex, cologne and the smell of a man.
god, i love to be a woman!
Comments-[ comments.]
yesterday, i spent quite a bit of time contemplating my aging process and where i still fit in as a woman sexually.
at my age i am too old to still be single, yet too young to acknowledge my age-derived disadvantage and diminshed choices.
not to toot my own horn, but i have always been a woman who got whatever or whoever i wanted.
i would go to a bars and make 5$ bets with my guys friends about who could pick up and screw somebody first.
i had prime pickings for a while, sometimes just to add insult to injury, i would pick up the girl that my guy friend choose.
now, as i age, as i start to realize that my physical body cannot keep up with my sexual and emotional immaturity....
I POUT!! i won't give up, because i am just not good at rejection and i no longer have the body of a teenager.
that's not all...
for the last few weeks, i had to deal with my ex finding "someone else", before I did...
i reacted childishly, but the reality is that i have had some of the best times as a single woman since we broke up.
i dont want him back at all, but i hate the fact he has a "sure thing" fuck and i am still interviewing potential boy toys.
in a moment of weakness, i went to bed sad and feeling like maybe i was "losing my MOJO".....maybe i should "grow up".
As only my luck would have it, I later hear a tenacious banging on my door and my bedroom window at 4am.
not looking or feeling my best, i relunctantly opened the door... what was behind it BLEW MY MIND!!
maybe i have the Mrs. Robinson syndrome, i dont know,
regardless, i find myself incredibly attracted to younger boys.
I opened my door to the most beautiful speciman i ever laid eyes on (i ever laid actually)...
my ex-boyfriend's roommate, standing before me like an obiedent, hornery boy...
i had met him a few times before and each time i found myself fighting my sexual attraction to him,
after all i wasn't proud of it as he was only 24 and my ex's best friend,
but he really did get my juices flowing and my sexual prowler instincts.
MANY times i fantasized about him having his way with me, and suddenly - there he was before me,
He was so sexy and confident, so delicious... i wanted to EAT HIM ALIVE....
The point is, just as i thought i was about to "give in" to my invitable fate of being too old to be sexy (i'm only 31).
Life, god, destiny, temptation -whatever- placed this young man at my door.
for the first time, i was intimidated, reluctant, unsure if i could meet his normal standards (young, hard bodied, perky tits)
but that sweet smelling, perfectly sculpted, 24 year old boy came over to ROCK MY WORLD~
he proudly warned me about his dick and he was right...
tiny waste, broad shoulders, young, dark hair, melted chocolate brown eyes~~ I had no choice,
i had to own that, if only for a night...
he kept telling me how sexy he'd always thought i was,
while he delivered me a joy i had long been deprived of...
hours of unadultered pleasure~ I knew then, i still had it.
my mojo is still in tact, and this had to be a sign from the Sex Gods-a sign of encouragement.
as i lay in bed, i am going crazy as i can still smell him on my pillow.
a combination of raw sex, cologne and the smell of a man.
god, i love to be a woman!
THE LESSER OF TWO EVILS
THE LESSER OF TWO EVILS
I hate catch 22's
they are very dangerous for one's self-esteem.
i want to choose the lesser of two evil's
but either situation carries baggage.
what to do?
i am a hedonist- a pleasure junkie
i am content only when fulfilling things that i find pleasurable
-as i am sure it is human nature to do so-
unfortunately, an admitted hedonist will tell you
that our distorted nature rarely alllows for us to make certain decisions
-albeit a good moral one-
over that which will give us instant gratification.
my instinct is to please myself now, apologize later
my life only feels balanced and worthwhile while succumbing to my evil selfishness
often time the pleasure does not measure up to my later amout of guilt,
i still choose the instant gratification ~everytime~ impulsively.
why?
i already told you why.
i only wish that while i was developing my values and morals,
that i would have learned to foresee the guilt BEFORE i take the pleasure or to say NO,
but that's what makes me a hedonist and that's why i am sharing this with you.
Comments-[ comments.]
I hate catch 22's
they are very dangerous for one's self-esteem.
i want to choose the lesser of two evil's
but either situation carries baggage.
what to do?
i am a hedonist- a pleasure junkie
i am content only when fulfilling things that i find pleasurable
-as i am sure it is human nature to do so-
unfortunately, an admitted hedonist will tell you
that our distorted nature rarely alllows for us to make certain decisions
-albeit a good moral one-
over that which will give us instant gratification.
my instinct is to please myself now, apologize later
my life only feels balanced and worthwhile while succumbing to my evil selfishness
often time the pleasure does not measure up to my later amout of guilt,
i still choose the instant gratification ~everytime~ impulsively.
why?
i already told you why.
i only wish that while i was developing my values and morals,
that i would have learned to foresee the guilt BEFORE i take the pleasure or to say NO,
but that's what makes me a hedonist and that's why i am sharing this with you.
BAD GIRL
BAD GIRL
I’ve been a bad, bad girl.
I’m sorry and want forgiveness.
It’s just this naughty little girl,
who lives inside me. She’s the bad one.
She doesn’t seem to care,
consequences don’t matter,
When facing the rewards
of instant gratification.
PLEASURE
LUST
She’s insatiable.
She feeds off of desire.
Do you desire her?
Let her taunt and tease you…
You won’t realize it’s happened
Until you’ve already fallen for her charms.
FLIRT
WHORE
She’s edged her way into your fantasies.
Do you have the guts to attempt to have her?
Or will you remain silent in words,
Yet, screaming inside?
DESIRE
POWER
Do you know the power that lies between her thighs?
Power enough to get you to do what she wants.
Eventually you will lose- she always wins.
She can’t NOT win, she would die.
Or she would die trying.
OBSESSION
CONTROL
She dangerous because she is always thinking,
Pre-planning her actions, planting the seeds
Into the minds of those she seethes.
Oozing with wetness, she craves her next victim.
She needs to feed her ego,
So she can grow bigger, stronger,
More powerful, more irresistible.
For now, I will hide her
And all of her terrible little secrets.
But it won’t be long
Until she’s on the prowl again.
WET DAYDREAMS DO COME TRUE
WET DAYDREAMS DO COME TRUE
In the shower last night, while i was exfoliating my nipples (as an essential part of my compulsive daily hygeine rituals), i was showering with the ghost of my last lover. too skinny for my liking really, but i loved his cock... especially his hard wet cock poking me while fighting for the stream of water. i was fondly remembering how we soaped each other up or he would so lovingly shave my precious treasure. the soft freshly shaven skin of my pussy being tickled by the hard water stream. HEAVEN!! his slippery dick would enter me while he held me up and pushed me against the shower wall. my cum gushes down his leg and he can easily tell the difference between my warm juices and the now cold water. he pulls out and kisses my lips so gently while the water cascades between our lips. PORN STAR! YOU AREN'T DONE! not while this is throbbing like this, baby! please! he jams a couple fingers up inside me and kisses my neck while i stand there completely enslaved by this non-stop gushing orgasm. i see stars, my knees quiver, nipples hard from the now freezing water. i tell him i am done with him now, and let him have the big fuzzy towel, this time.........ohhhhh, i do miss that so, but for tonight, i dont even feel like playing with myself :-(
Comments-[ comments.]
In the shower last night, while i was exfoliating my nipples (as an essential part of my compulsive daily hygeine rituals), i was showering with the ghost of my last lover. too skinny for my liking really, but i loved his cock... especially his hard wet cock poking me while fighting for the stream of water. i was fondly remembering how we soaped each other up or he would so lovingly shave my precious treasure. the soft freshly shaven skin of my pussy being tickled by the hard water stream. HEAVEN!! his slippery dick would enter me while he held me up and pushed me against the shower wall. my cum gushes down his leg and he can easily tell the difference between my warm juices and the now cold water. he pulls out and kisses my lips so gently while the water cascades between our lips. PORN STAR! YOU AREN'T DONE! not while this is throbbing like this, baby! please! he jams a couple fingers up inside me and kisses my neck while i stand there completely enslaved by this non-stop gushing orgasm. i see stars, my knees quiver, nipples hard from the now freezing water. i tell him i am done with him now, and let him have the big fuzzy towel, this time.........ohhhhh, i do miss that so, but for tonight, i dont even feel like playing with myself :-(
My personal AD
PERSONAL AD:
THURSTON, ARE YOU OUT THERE?
Wanted, a man who wants a beautiful,
intelligent woman, who's goal is to be
the drunken, spoiled wife of a powerful
man and who likes to be called Luvy.
Intelligence and looks are important,
but they certainly do not exclusively
outweigh good bank figures and
access to credit cards. Must smell
good and travel alot. Monogamist
need not respond.Thanks Darling.
Comments-[ comments.]
THURSTON, ARE YOU OUT THERE?
Wanted, a man who wants a beautiful,
intelligent woman, who's goal is to be
the drunken, spoiled wife of a powerful
man and who likes to be called Luvy.
Intelligence and looks are important,
but they certainly do not exclusively
outweigh good bank figures and
access to credit cards. Must smell
good and travel alot. Monogamist
need not respond.Thanks Darling.
Number 33
Number 33
While I was making my energy dinner
of macaroni and cheese (I know, I know!),
I was thinking and came up with my next
“when-I-grow-up-I-want-to-be-a…” idea.
I want to be the quality control tester
at a dildo factory! Someone has to have
the job because each one comes with a
“money back if not satisfied guarantee”.
Certainly they wouldn’t make such a
promise if they weren’t sure it would
“deliver”. It only makes sense that
they have someone test the thing.
Some even come with an “Inspected
by number 33” sticker. Why don’t
you read about those kinds of jobs
in the Chicago Tribune’s classifieds?
Yuck! Scary thought. Wonder what
they do with the returned ones?
Are they recycled? Or is there a
Goodwill for wayward dildos?
Poor unwanted little buggers.
Comments-[ comments.]
While I was making my energy dinner
of macaroni and cheese (I know, I know!),
I was thinking and came up with my next
“when-I-grow-up-I-want-to-be-a…” idea.
I want to be the quality control tester
at a dildo factory! Someone has to have
the job because each one comes with a
“money back if not satisfied guarantee”.
Certainly they wouldn’t make such a
promise if they weren’t sure it would
“deliver”. It only makes sense that
they have someone test the thing.
Some even come with an “Inspected
by number 33” sticker. Why don’t
you read about those kinds of jobs
in the Chicago Tribune’s classifieds?
Yuck! Scary thought. Wonder what
they do with the returned ones?
Are they recycled? Or is there a
Goodwill for wayward dildos?
Poor unwanted little buggers.
12.04.2003
My salutations
Comments-[ comments.]
.: Sex Facts :.
Actual amount of semen per ejaculation: 1-2 teaspoons
Average number of times a man will ejaculate in his lifetime: 7,200
Average number of times he will ejaculate from masturbation: 2,000
Average total amount of lifetime ejaculate: 14 gallons
Average speed of ejaculation: 28 miles per hour
Average number of calories in a teaspoon of semen: 7
Average length of penis when not erect: 3.5 inches
Average length when erect: 5.1
Smallest natural penis recorded: 5/8 of an inch
Largest natural penis recorded: 11 inches
Largest penis in the animal kingdom: 11 feet (blue whale)
Most arousing time of day/season for a man: early morning/fall
Foods that improve sex life: oysters, lean meat, seafood, whole grains, and wheat germ
Amount of time needed for a man to regain erection: from 2 min to 2weeks
Average number of erections per day for a man: 11
Average number of erections during the night: 9
Distance sperm travels to fertilize an egg: 3-4 inches
The human equivalent: 26 miles (a marathon distance)
Time it takes the sperm: 2.5 seconds
Sperm life: 2 1/2 months (from development to ejaculation)
It is common for men to wake up with "morning wood," a name for an a.m. erection.
Comments-[ comments.]
Actual amount of semen per ejaculation: 1-2 teaspoons
Average number of times a man will ejaculate in his lifetime: 7,200
Average number of times he will ejaculate from masturbation: 2,000
Average total amount of lifetime ejaculate: 14 gallons
Average speed of ejaculation: 28 miles per hour
Average number of calories in a teaspoon of semen: 7
Average length of penis when not erect: 3.5 inches
Average length when erect: 5.1
Smallest natural penis recorded: 5/8 of an inch
Largest natural penis recorded: 11 inches
Largest penis in the animal kingdom: 11 feet (blue whale)
Most arousing time of day/season for a man: early morning/fall
Foods that improve sex life: oysters, lean meat, seafood, whole grains, and wheat germ
Amount of time needed for a man to regain erection: from 2 min to 2weeks
Average number of erections per day for a man: 11
Average number of erections during the night: 9
Distance sperm travels to fertilize an egg: 3-4 inches
The human equivalent: 26 miles (a marathon distance)
Time it takes the sperm: 2.5 seconds
Sperm life: 2 1/2 months (from development to ejaculation)
It is common for men to wake up with "morning wood," a name for an a.m. erection.
